this is leah, after months of no word, yes i'm still alive, but i've been doing some thinking...

about that post about hell.

i'm not sure how great this is to post on here?

but i've been wondering about christianity lately.

maybe just because it's easier to not have it in my life, and i know that if i do have god in my life, i want him to be something real and integrated and not something i pretend to experience in a church pew or during a worship song

and i'm having trouble accepting that there are so so many people that..go to hell?

i don't know, it's just hard for me to swallow right now in my life, maybe because i am constantly faced with such amazing people, maybe not amazing by christian standards, but i find them to be real and deep and...human.

like i am human.

and i am not any better.

so why should i live while they die?

i'm not so sure anymore.