whore
So, I really don't want to wait to have sex. I've been hearing all about this purity business since I was like 12 - you know, "And the Bride Wore White" and "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" and "Every Young Woman's Battle" and all of that stuff. Yeah, I know it all by heart. Save sex for marriage, it's a gift, it's God's design, you can't take it back, waiting makes it worth it.. etc.
But when I was 12 I didn't have any guys interested in me - I'd never kissed anyone, much less made out, and I'd certainly never given anyone a blow job. I'm 18 now and that's all different, and while I'm not proud of some of it (especially not that last part..after knowing the guy for a week..) it's still all really tempting.
A friend who likes me wants to fool around when I get home, no strings attached or whatever. I know if one of my roommates said they were considering doing it I'd definitely be trying to talk her out of it, but I'm strangely tempted to. Like, why not, you know, if we're not going to have sex?
and then there are the Christian answers - "because just 'not having sex' isn't purity either; purity is abstaining from anything that makes you lust!" "because you have to set an example!" Yeah, okay, I know. But right now, I really don't care.
I've been talking a lot lately with one of my roommates. She's slept with 2 guys and done sexual stuff with many others. She's in a serious, Christian relationship right now and they do everything but. She understands where I'm coming from with all of this, but at least she has an outlet. I don't. And so I flirt with every guy I see. I do NOT want to be in a relationship right now; it would just be bad timing and I couldn't handle it. Buuuuuuut I'm getting really sick of this whole purity thing. If I can't have sex, I at least want to fool around or whatever. And for the first time, I want to do it and I know that I could.
posted by Liane at
7:06 PM
3 Comments:
it's really odd, but I was thinking about some of the same things recently.
8:47 PM
I'm not going to try to talk you out of it because I doubt I really could. I will say that there's a huge difference between being physical with someone you love and the no strings attached thing. I've done both and fooling around with someone who doesn't love you will probably make you feel worthless/used/unwanted, even if you both agree it's no strings attached. Then again, maybe not, but think about the possible emotional (and physical, tada) consequences before you agree to do whatever.
Most Christians fool around before they get married, regardless of what the books say. If you're going to do it, please please please be careful. HPV is ridiculously easy to catch, as are a myriad of other things. I'm less concerned about what your future husband will think of it than if you have to come to your marriage with an STD.
12:10 PM
yeah, that's honestly one of my biggest reasons. the std thing.
also, as beth mentioned, be careful with the no strings attached thing. usually it changes for one of the people involved and then..oh hey, the other person isnt interested in anything beyond hooking up, or they don't even want to do that anymore. it sucks, been there. well. not with sex. i'd imagine that would only make things even worse.
i don't want to say i'm glad that you are dealing with this, or that i'm glad you might decide to not wait, but. i will say i'm glad i'm not the only one facing these issues, i used to feel that way. college changes everything, right.
6:13 PM
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